I know a guy who used to work in the maintenance department of a maximum-security prison. One day, he had to remove an exit sign that was attached to the wall with tamper-resistant machine screws. Conventional screwdrivers were useless for removing the fasteners. What my friend needed was a special tool that conformed to the unusual head pattern, but he didn’t have the tool.
While lamenting the problem, his inmate helper said that he knew how to get the screws out. All he needed was a pass to go back to his cell for some supplies. The convict got his pass and returned with a toothbrush and a lighter (which prisoners are allowed to have). He held the lighter under the end of the toothbrush handle. When the heat softened the plastic sufficiently, he pushed the end of the handle directly onto the screw. The plastic conformed perfectly to the screw head. After the plastic cooled down and hardened, he simply turned out the screw.
Herrick Kimball, Moravia, NY
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Moral of the story: Hire ex-cons.
That is sofa king funny! :-D