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Wife working with husband

| Posted in General Discussion on May 4, 2000 07:17am

*
Hi, I’ve got a question for you. My husband is a contractor and I’m considering working with him on the jobsite. I already do all his paperwork but would like to get out there and do some building. I occasionally help him and I like it, he says it helps him out and thinks that I should. Can anybody give me any advice?

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  1. Mike_Smith | Mar 25, 2000 02:25am | #1

    *
    Renee, there are a couple of wife/husband teams on this board... i'm sure some of them will show up and give you the benefit of their experience....

    my wife and i have built two houses together, but she pursues her own career so i will have to defer to someone else...

    1. Kathy_Blodgett | Mar 25, 2000 10:54am | #2

      *Renee, you go girl!!My Jim always has me helping out. Just last week there was some footers he had to dig by hand, but his arms were tired, so he got me to do them for him. ( he did sit in the shade of the tree nearby and shout encoragement though ). The week before we were standing trusses on the second level of a new house. My Jim was on the ground as he said it was very important to make sure that the crane driver hooked the cables onto the trusses correctly, so I was given the job of placing them and nailing off.There is one word of warning I must pass on. Be carefull when they are trimming out a job and think that there is no-one else around as they tend to get a bit frisky.Bad boy Jim!! No biscuit!!

      1. Ryan_C | Mar 25, 2000 01:19pm | #3

        *Renee:My wife says there are two true tests of a marrage:1) canoeing together.2) laying linoleum together.Both of these were the root of the worst fights we ever had in our 8 years of marrage.We did go canoeing together years later. I don't think we'll ever do the floor again.

        1. Jon_Jordan | Mar 25, 2000 03:59pm | #4

          *Renee, since communication is one of my weak points because of I'm too tired, the stripers are runnin' or I saw an 8 point buck last night at the end of our property. Anyhow, I personally hoped I could remind you of the advantages of you coming to the hands on part of our "little" company. I also hope to possibly generate some more input from our fellow husband and wife TEAMS in hopes that you will make a decision and I will quit beating a dead horse! First and foremost you have the span of our marriage to reccolect all of my successes and failures in this buisiness. Not only do you have the thorny duty of watching our bottom line (which I greatly appreciate), but the times when you have filled in for missing persons on the job it was as if you belonged there. I know there will be a few unforseen scheduling woes with babysitting, soccer practice and whatever else goes along with organizing work around our little angels but I have not yet been stopped by lifes obstacles. Another selfish reason that I would like you on the jobsite is that your personality lends proffesionalism to our crew, especially to new clients that haven't experienced my overwhelming charm,-Ha! It is also a selfish fact that I love the opportunity to "ride" a complaining carpenter when you are 30 feet in the air on a walkboard cheerfully running cornice. I also am of the belief that the quality of work you capable of producing could only add value to what I have worked so hard to establish. I know you opened the door on this forum to gain input on whatever is worrying you, but I swear the only place where we don't strain our bliss has seemed to me, on a jobsite, or fishing, unless the "skeeters" are biting of course! P.S. your tool belt is still where you left it, Love' Me!

          1. jim_"crazy_legs"_blodg | Mar 25, 2000 04:24pm | #5

            *Renee - There is no reason why a woman can't be every bit as good a carpenter as a man. If your relationship can take 24/7, I'd say jump in. No employee is as valuable to a company as a true partner would be. You say you're good with the numbers AND like to carpenter? I could use some good help if Jon doesn't know what he's got there. You sound like a "keeper" to me. What kind of truck you drive?(and "Kathy", you promised not to tell if I "poked a little fun at you" at work.)

          2. Mike_Smith | Mar 25, 2000 11:04pm | #6

            *nice to see you two, and you two, and you two, letting it all hang out here...and , this forum IS a lot cheaper than a marriage counselor,...while we've got you here, would you care to discuss the household chores,and the child rearing duty sheet,and the seperate vacation schedules,...les see...hmm .what did i leave out?b What, me, worry?

          3. GACC_DAllas | Mar 26, 2000 05:01pm | #7

            *My wife Janie keeps our office running soooooo smoothly that you can hear it hum. If she wanted to go out in the field with me I would have no problem with that unless the office stopped humming. I'm lost in all those 941's, FWT's, FICA's, 940 corperate returns, who needs a bill, who's late with a payment, W2's, W4's, franchise tax, insurance audits, etc., etc.,.......................Ed. Williams

          4. Renee_Jordan | Mar 28, 2000 04:15am | #8

            *Hey everybody, thanks for your input. Well, on day one I got sunburned, day two rained on. That sure is better than being stuck inside all day. I think I'm going to stick around for awhile. Later, Renee

          5. Armin_Gollannek | Mar 29, 2000 04:05am | #9

            *Renee, I'm a stairbuilder, my wife works has worked with me full time for 10 years or so. She operates all the machines and does very well. I have had to wifeinize the shop though. She's a little thing so some machines had to be lowered. It works out pretty good. HOWEVER there are lessons to be learned!! Job site chicks are pretty sentisive, yelling at a male employee is no big thing, yelling at your wife has a long term negative effect. I suggest you give it a try just cut your husband a little slack, afterall he,s used to working around some pretty hard assed guys. Good luck.

          6. Joel_Dowling | Mar 30, 2000 08:21am | #10

            *Our little outfit is set up with husband and wife in the field, in the office and on the sales calls. Our customer base continues to grow because of the balanced view that the he/she duality seems to provide. The novelty of a good-looking woman with a tool belt on her hips and a respirator on her face wears off when the work starts. Our subs deal with either of us, and the lumber yard calls us Mr. and Mrs. Copper J(our company is called Copper J Builders). We like it just fine this way - the only hard part is knowing when work is over and it is time to be lovers, not business partners!

          7. SHGLaw | Mar 31, 2000 01:52pm | #11

            *And now, I voice from the dark side. What happens when there's two bosses on the job. What happens when you scream "it's falling, get over here" and somebody demands first to know "what?" Every person I pay intuitively knows who's the boss. It's my wife. I seem to be the only fool who can't figure that out. And since there's some bone in my head that stops me from having to explain myself every single time I say something or give a direction, I really can't stand having the boss looking over my shoulder with the smug little look on her face.I have no problem with women. But best for me to keep some distance with my darling wife.SHG

          8. Kay_J. | Apr 04, 2000 11:54pm | #12

            *The other half of Copper J checking in. Actually, Joel and I started working construction independently of one another and just gravitated to working together about 5 years into our marriage. It's worked well for 20 years or so, leaving many satisfied customers and co-workers, some of whom have become life-long friends. We tell people that before going to work each day, we arm wrestle to decide who'll be boss. In truth, over the years, we've grown to realize that in some area, he takes the lead, in others I do, and in yet others we meet in the middle (Monty Python's autonomous collective approach). Compromise and cooperation is essential, as is time away from each other with outside interests. "Spaces in our togetherness", as it were.We'd both be miserable working for someone else, and for the most part, the's no one else we'd rather work with. We never have to look over each other's shoulders to see that our high business standards are being upheld. We approach each other with professional respect. And we approach our client's homes with respect as well, including their kids, their pets, their posessions, their yards and their neighborhoods. When we do need more hands we hire subs and other craftspeople whose work and company we value. When we do get on each other's nerves, and it does happen, we make sure we resolve matters discretely. No client wants to inadvertently tune in to Family Feud.The only time I've ever really felt specifically unique on the job was the day I fell, fully clothed with bags, into a client's pool. I emerged, very un-Esther William's-like, to howls of laughter, yet was declared the winner of the wet t-shirt contest, an honor that Joel could not have garnered. The only difficulty we encounter on a regular basis, is the occasional customer, usually male, who can't resist saying, "So, you brought the boss to work today", or "So,he's even got you working". Wears thin real fast, but usually goes away after they've observed us at work for a short time. Not all men can share such a traditionally male space with such good nature, and I give Joel high marks, and my love,for being one who can.

          9. Michael_Ampula | Apr 05, 2000 06:52am | #13

            *I commend all of the husband and wife teams. A strong marriage is a beautiful thing to see in action. I would love to work with my wife, but our interests are just far to diverse. You guys are luckier that all get out. Congrats.

          10. Worthington | May 04, 2000 07:17am | #14

            *I started out working for an electrical contractor 15 years ago. Then I married him, and now he's retiring and I'm buying the company. I've been lucky to learn the trade and the business from a true master. It's always given us alot to talk about...personel, clients,other contractors, problems and solutions. If any one gives me a hard time at work he just tells them "You better listen to her...she's the boss!" I generally don't have problems with most guys, the only ones I seem to have problems with are those that don't really know their stuff and are just trying to bullshit their way thru things.It's great to have my spouses complete support, and know that I always have someone to lean on that understands the complexities of running a million dollar job.

  2. Renee_Jordan | May 04, 2000 07:17am | #15

    *
    Hi, I've got a question for you. My husband is a contractor and I'm considering working with him on the jobsite. I already do all his paperwork but would like to get out there and do some building. I occasionally help him and I like it, he says it helps him out and thinks that I should. Can anybody give me any advice?

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